"And how should I presume?"

Just one awkward twenty-something who hopes to, one day, change the world.

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The Wash to my Zoe (and tag)
The John to my Sherlock
The Keladry to my Alanna
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Posts tagged "monosexism"


60% of straight women say they would never date a bisexual. 50% of straight men say they would never date a bisexual. 40% of gay men and lesbians say they would never date a bisexual. Bisexuals are obviously just greedy. They’re just bisexual so they can sleep with fewer people and lose opportunities for relationships based solely on their sexual orientation. 

(via jethroq)

To your idiot anon: Saying you can't use monosexism because it includes het and gay people is like saying you can't use sexism because it includes white and black man or racism because it includes poc men and poc women etc etc etc. Just because there are different levels of oppression in an also oppressive group doesn't mean they don't still oppress others. It's called intersectionality...
bemusedlybespectacled bemusedlybespectacled Said:



a bi/pan person marrying someone does not indicate a preference for that gender, it indicates a preference for that PERSON

(via gallifreyandeathdealer)





if my professor skates over the fact that Sonnet 20 is literally Shakespeare saying “yo I’m super gay” I’m gonna be pissed

yeah I’m angry about bi erasure too. 

As a straight woman I feel the same way about erasure of GLBT people. Not intending to be offensive or anything so apologies if this is offensive but how do we know that Shakespeare’s sonnets in general are autobiographical? AFAIK that sonnet was dedicated to a man, but the feelings in the text may not be Shakespeare the poet’s but those of a persona, which doesn’t disprove or prove that he wasn’t or was gay. But then again, people in general don’t know all that much about Shakespeare’s personal feelings so anything people say is guesswork

Why would Shakespeare have invented a gay poetry writing persona when m/m activity was literally punishable by death?

I’m gonna go off on some wild guesswork here, but it’s almost like we know he was married to a woman and they had three children, but he addressed 126 stunningly lovely sonnets to men. It’s almost like we know the rest of his poems were addressed to a lady. It’s almost like Shakespeare’s works lend themselves to queer readings because he was queer and enjoyed playing with and subverting traditional notions of gender/ courtly love/ poetry. This is pretty radical, but maybe writers write about things because they want to express their lived experiences and desires. 

In conclusion, LOVE THAT BISEXUAL. 

(via jcatgrl)


Stop throwing bi people in different-gender relationships under the bus 2k14

(via burdenedwithgloriousbooty)


The thing is when you’re bisexual, you’re not really surprised when a straight person is biphobic. Sure it sucks and you’re like “well fuck you too dude” to whoever the prick is; but it’s not so astonishing.

Biphobic gay people on the other hand, actually hurt like a motherfucker. Like bro you’re supposed to be on my side??? Like even “my people” can’t accept me?? That hurts so much more than some random dude who expects a threesome.

(via jcatgrl)


First - some background:

  • I’ve been seeing more and more people on tumblr arguing that monosexism can’t exist because gay and lesbian people don’t benefit from the oppression of bi people
  • This is a rebuttal of this argument
  • However, monosexism isn’t about gay and lesbian people
  • Seriously, read the links
  • No, SRSLY
  • Pulling the discussion that way DERAILS IT YET AGAIN and draws attention away from the real issue - centering it around gay and lesbian people when it’s supposed to be about bi people and our oppression
  • image
  • I’m posting this anyway because JFC already

Now, some statistical facts (sources are linked):

Social benefits (all elaborated in my book please just read it if you want to know more, I promise it’s all in there):

  • Bisexual erasure stabilizes the heterosexual/homosexual binary. Acknowledging that it exists would insinuate that sexuality is changeable, making it impossible to argue that gay people were “born this way”. So monosexism makes it easier to legitimize homosexuality.
  • Bisexual erasure makes it possible to create (usually binary, cissexist) gender-segregated gay and lesbian environments. Because bisexual people always carry the “threat” of being with “other genders” and then “bringing them into the community”. So monosexism makes it easier to organize and maintain gay and lesbian communities.
  • Bisexual erasure makes it possible for gay and lesbian people to use respectability politics with regards to sex. Because bi men are viewed as closeted men who sneak out to have unsafe anonymous sex behind their wives’ backs, and because bi women are viewed as sluts who make lesbians look bad because they’re “sexually available to men”. So monosexism makes it easier for gay and lesbian people to appear sexually “moral”.
  • These are all points made by gay scholar Kenji Yoshino (and elaborated by me in my book). Go read his article.

Material benefits (all elaborated in my book please just read it if you want to know more, I promise it’s all in there):

  • Gay and lesbian people benefit from the work that bi people put in promoting and being active in queer movements/communities without having to credit them or give anything back to them.
  • Because bi people are excluded from leadership in these movements/communities, gay and lesbian people are the leaders and decision makers. That means they control communities’ agenda, money and resources.
  • Since internalized monosexism often makes bi people believe that bisexuality isn’t important enough to organize around, many contribute most of their activist time and energy to promoting gay and lesbian issues - again meaning queer movements benefit from the work of bi people at the expense of bi people and movements.
  • And of course there’s the part where (as stated above) almost all LGBT money goes to the GGGG part of it, and that bisexual people actually earn less money than gay and lesbian people.
  • These are points made by bisexual scholar and activist Miguel Obradors (and elaborated by me in my book). Go read his article.

And then there are other side privileges…

Then combine all this with the fact that bi people are DISPROPORTIONATELY WOMEN, PEOPLE OF COLOR AND TRANS PEOPLE. Then do the math.

Want to know more? Follow the goddamn links.

Now -


[Image: Samuel L. Jackson from the movie Pulp Fiction aiming a gun towards the camera looking angry (Say What Again meme). Top text: “SAY MONOSEXISM DOESN’T EXIST”. Bottom text: “ONE MORE TIME”]

(via thebookhangover)





I want a bisexual character that is constantly calling out and being annoyed by everyone’s biphobic bullshit. 

hopefully they get to do other stuff as well, otherwise that would be a boring character

do we even need to count how many straight guy characters are out there that never do anything bu be annoyed at other people, generally for no good reason, and yet are still wildly popular with fandoms?? just saying


When I’m dating a man I’m no longer bisexual

Just like when I’m at home, I’m no longer employed

Or when I’m not studying I’m no longer a student.

Mmm object impermanency 

(via queenofsquirrely)


"I don’t understand bisexuality, I don’t think it exists"

well I don’t understand physics but you don’t see me floating off into space because gravity no longer applies to me

(via ghostofcommunism)

Asker Anonymous Asks:
If it's okay, could you tell me any slurs used on bisexuals? I promise I'll never use them on anyone; I'm just wondering if there are any.
bemusedlybespectacled bemusedlybespectacled Said:



Obligatory warning for slurs y’all. Well first a disclaimer that the majority of these slurs/insults are aimed at bi women and not all of them are just restricted to bisexuals but are primarily aimed at them, they range from mildly annoying to goddamn awful:

bihet (though this is often used against bi women specifically)

breeder (alledgedly intented to be used on straight people yet almost excuslively used against bisexuals and other minorities, funny how that happens)

AC/DC (not the band, but the type of switch)




sexual dyslexic (points for added ableism)

Ones mainly aimed at bi women:



Of course bisexuals get all the other homophobic and lesbophobic slurs aimed at them too, and get their community labels used against them as if they are slurs such as “bi-curious”. These are all the ones I can think of atm, if anybody has more please add.

tbh heteroflexible has been used in some super disgusting ways to describe bi women against our consent. Homoflexible as well.

(I dunno how many of these I’d call slurs but they’re definitely all gross and disgusting attacks on bi women)


I love it how people think bisexuals just pulled the term ‘monosexual’ out of our asses.
“I’m a homosexual not a monosexual”

Yeah yeah okay Molly I understand that you don’t want to be called American, but you live in Idaho babe.

(via bisexualzuko)




'straight passing privilege' and 'cis passing privilege' don't exist. What's happening is called erasure, it’s not privilege, it’s part of oppression and a result of heteronormativity and cisnormativity. It isn’t privilege to have your orientation and gender constantly assumed wrongly, it isn’t a privilege to be erased and treated like you don’t exist.

It is a privilege though to not be read as those things however. People don’t see a trans person when they look at me and I avoid a lot of violence and grief because of that.

I agree that getting misread as straight/cis is a part of oppression, because in a less hecked-up society nobody would be presumed straight or cis. But I’m with phoenixhobbit, NOT being read as queer/trans is a serious privilege some of us don’t get.

At this point I am often unable to get read as cis. The street harassment, increased potential for violence, open staring, rude questions, and intentional/knowing misgendering/ungendering I face as a result of being visibly queer and trans is awful. This DID NOT HAPPEN to me when I read as cis and more heteromasculine. I didn’t like being read as cis and straight, it felt gross, but believe me when I say that being a target is worse. 

thing is, if being read as straight is a privilege, then that privilege has to extend to everyone

closeted queer folk? straight passing!

a single queer person just walking down the street? straight passing!

literally every person on earth unless they in some way make it obvious that they are queer? straight passing!

if everyone read as straight (which, in a heteronormative society, is most people regardless of their orientation) has straight passing privilege, then I think it’s unfair that all accusations of this privilege are directed at bisexual people

if it’s not about just being read as straight, then that’s not talking about privilege, it’s using the language of social justice to oppress bisexual people

(via meridok)


When gay people are assumed to be straight until told otherwise: Compulsory heterosexuality.

When bisexual people are assumed to be straight until told otherwise: Straight passing privilege 

So why is it oppression when it happens to someone gay but a privilege when it happens to someone bi?

Oh wait its not, people are just biphobic.

(via apersnicketylemon)